10th June 2009
US apologises for revolution as MP expense scandal grows
A contrite Mr Obama hands the apology personally to Downing Street |
Stating that while they had wanted "no taxation without representation", a US Department of State spokesman said that his predecessors had not truly known what what they were rebelling against.
Duck tales
"If we'd known that we started a war because we didn't have anyone in parliament to bill us for duck islands, porn DVDs and even charitable donations, why, we wouldn't have bothered quite frankly," said Bing R Boozlebeck.
"We could have got on with other things, like decimating the Indians or something."
Tail spin
The American schism from Britain started in 1776 when a residents' association demanded it had an MP in order to boost property values.
However, the British parliamentary system that the US once wanted to run a local franchise of has been hit by scandal after leaks revealed that many MPs treated expense claims like a kid in a sweet shop.
Rescue rangers
"Jesus H Christ," added Mr Boozlebeck, "that was a close one. Why if we got our way it doesn't bear thinking about - just imagine how many dirty moats you could fit in California alone. And guess who'd foot the bill. Again, sorry, but jeez."
The Foreign Office brushed off the US apology saying: "Oh, it's nothing really, water under the bridge and all that, don't mention it."
Duck tales
"If we'd known that we started a war because we didn't have anyone in parliament to bill us for duck islands, porn DVDs and even charitable donations, why, we wouldn't have bothered quite frankly," said Bing R Boozlebeck.
"We could have got on with other things, like decimating the Indians or something."
Tail spin
The American schism from Britain started in 1776 when a residents' association demanded it had an MP in order to boost property values.
However, the British parliamentary system that the US once wanted to run a local franchise of has been hit by scandal after leaks revealed that many MPs treated expense claims like a kid in a sweet shop.
Rescue rangers
"Jesus H Christ," added Mr Boozlebeck, "that was a close one. Why if we got our way it doesn't bear thinking about - just imagine how many dirty moats you could fit in California alone. And guess who'd foot the bill. Again, sorry, but jeez."
The Foreign Office brushed off the US apology saying: "Oh, it's nothing really, water under the bridge and all that, don't mention it."
