var quiz = new Array(); var r = 0;
var analPage = 'xmasans.html';
quiz[r++] =('180294~85~1 Getting up for work at this time of year, don you now~A black suit, black tie and grey shirt.~Gay apparel.~A bright red suit trimmed with white fur, complete with matching hat.~~1~2');
quiz[r++] =('112946~53~2 You go into a wine bar and ask for a glass of house red. The barman asks how you would like it served. You say:~With a whisky chaser.~With a "ho ho ho".~With the contents of a spice rack emptied into it, then heated.~~1~3');
quiz[r++] =('142783~67~3 How are your halls decked?:~With cobwebs, cracks and a 1970s Formica telephone table in the corner.~With boughs of holly.~With firework explosions made into pure tat, along with plastic images of smiling Santas, holly wreaths and a landing strip\'s worth of twinkling lights.~~1~3');
quiz[r++] =('153438~72~4 You hear a Christmas tune in the shops. How do you react?:~By retching violently. Which is unfortunate for the other shoppers.~You smile jollily, wishing the next three people you meet to have a "merry Christmas and a happy New Year".~Joining in, then going to the kitchen department to get a mug to collect donations as you run through a selection of carols.~~1~3');
quiz[r++] =('149179~70~5 You nip out to the shops to pick up your usual fare of fags, eight Special Brews, bread, milk and a Pot Noodle. But what do you actually purchase?:~Nothing because of the queues of Christmas shoppers.~As above, but you throw in some Mr Kipling Extra Special mince pies to treat yourself at this time of year.~As above, but with a turkey flavoured Pot Noodle as well as stuffing, Christmas pudding, brandy butter and 5kg of Brussels sprouts.~~1~3');
quiz[r++] =('25580~12~6 A group of carol singers knock on your front door and start singing. Do you?:~Slam the door in their face with a "ho ho ho".~Listening appreciatively and slip them your loose change.~Invite them in, give them cakes and join them in calling in on your neighbours.~~1~3');
quiz[r++] =('142779~67~7 When it comes to Christmas television, you:~Get sick of the build up, the appearance of third-rate comedians with trite clichés about the Great Escape, then the script-writer\'s holiday that are the usual collections of Christmas specials, that are as special as their needs.~Watch the Queen\'s Speech, but for you Christmas Day is about eating and gift giving.~Watch everything from 6pm on Christmas Eve until 11pm Boxing Day, catching up on video anything you may have missed through incidental gift giving, eating or excreting.~~1~3');
quiz[r++] =('196059~92~8 As a child, you believed that Father Christmas was:~A rather scary idea, what with the notion of an old man spying on kids throughout the year then visiting them in their rooms late at night.~Your dad, but you didn\'t care.~An embodiment of all things about Christmas, neatly meshing the commercial aspects with the religious in the image of St Nicholas.~~1~3');
quiz[r++] =('36235~17~9 The greatest story ever told is:~The one about your mate, two strippers in a hotel room and a bottle of tequila.~The Nativity~The Nativity and how it links to the one about your mate, two strippers in a hotel room and a bottle of tequila.~~1~3');
quiz[r++] =('174746~82~10 Last Christmas, you gave:~The Queen the finger during her speech.~Your heart. But it was given away on Boxing Day like an unwanted puppy.~Half your annual salary in gifts, cards and drinks to colleagues and casual acquaintances.~~1~3');